The Secret Successful People Don’t Tell

Hopefully, you have had a chance to download my new Nervous System Guide and create some time to time to read it? Ultimately, what I'm trying to show you is that your body will tell you when you are in a regulated, calm state, and this is where we all feel at ease, happy, with inner peace—where we'd like to spend the majority of our time.

If you haven’t made time to download it, it will be free for just one more week before it goes back to £97. [Download here] and give it a good read. You’ll thank yourself.

I’ve had SO many people positively impacted by learning about the nervous system, and this is just the start! I’ve spent the last couple of weeks having the most glorious conversations with people about how they can start to integrate this work. (I’ve offered a free 15-minute call to anyone who wants one – you can book here. If there’s no availability, just hit reply here, and I’ll make some space!)

Once you really understand the nervous system as physiological, you’ll see how crucial this understanding is, and how it can positively impact everything in your life moving forward… if you choose to dig into it and work towards living in alignment with it.

Ultimately, each and every one of us is in some way just chasing things we think will make us happy, aiming for what we think we “need” to get there. That phrase “next level” comes up so often, but what actually is this “next level”? Who decides what it should be, and how do we know when we’ve reached it? For many, it seems like a climb that never brings the deep-rooted satisfaction of “I’ve got it—I’ve made it!”

It’s this that brought about this email, actually.

It’s been a really interesting week in so many ways. SO many ways. Not only have I been chatting with lots of you in the 15-minute calls, but I’ve also been doing some market research calls with top-level entrepreneurs (there's that word top ‘level' again!). It’s been a valuable yet vulnerable process, and I feel incredibly privileged that people have been so open and raw with me. It’s given me insights not just on business growth but also on a personal level, for myself and the participants. I absolutely love human beings. I really, really do… I’m going off on one, aren’t I?

I’d never share the details of these conversations, never, but what I can share are the feelings and realisations that came from them as a whole, both personally and professionally.

In our online world, where so much money’s being made and so many people are doing big things, it’s all too easy to get swept up in the feeling you have to be doing that too. You almost lose sight of why you’re doing things, and it becomes like a race to get to that “next level” regardless of what it is or if you even want it.

Why? It’s dopamine mainly, I think… But that’s for another time. Right now, let’s go with this reason... We are all bombarded by external influence, the shiny-shiny, distractions, and we forget who we are and what we are doing it for. It’s hard, but oh so important, to do the regular self-growth work that enables us to keep our blinkers on and stay firmly on our own beautiful road, the ones we pave, create, and build in just the way we want to make it work for our clients and to enjoy our lives in just the way we (YOU) like it.

We all know the problem, on social media you only see what people choose to post: the big wins, the glossy moments. No one’s posting about their slice of beans on toast for tea because, let’s be honest, it’s not exactly inspirational. It’s the same with business, no one’s sharing the grind, the parts that make them feel a bit crap, or the things they’re only doing because they “have to” to keep the machine running, while secretly wishing it’d all just stop for a bit so they could enjoy some life without the pressure. Without feeling like they want to hide under a duvet and not come out…

Here’s what stood out most from all these conversations: Almost every person I spoke to wishes they could go back a few years to when they were doing what they were doing out of pure passion, making good money, and LOVING it. Back then, their business was built out of dreams, desires, and, well I just said it; raw passion. They were making good money to support the life they wanted, enjoying the life they were supporting, and helping people was central to that process. Gorgeous.

Then… it got bigger, and bigger, and bigger. Big numbers, high accolades, recognition… Now, they’re not doing the business they set out to do any more; they’re keeping a machine going, supporting other people, doing it because they have to, to keep the business fresh, to keep the funnels growing, to keep the ever expanding ‘business’ going. And somewhere along the line, the joy got lost, the purpose long forgotten, and their lives swept up in the process…

But don’t get me wrong, this doesn’t mean they’re miserable! Not at all. Everyone I’ve spoken to has so much joy and awareness that they’re actively looking for ways to dial back, to connect back to what feels great again. That’s the beauty of this nervous system work. When you learn to tune into it, you can really feel what that ‘feels good and right for you’ feeling is and that is central to helping you get back there.

All these conversations really impacted me in the very best way. Both in a way I can use personally and to pass on to you, my clients, friends and community.

I love the life I live. I really do. It has some tough bits in it, especially at the moment, but I love it, and I want to feel like this inside always, or even better! Sure, I want my business to grow, to help more and more people, to secure a future for myself, my family, and loved ones, but I also know there’s a point I want to reach, and that’s enough. I’m happy for it not to grow any bigger than my “enough” point, and these conversations really confirmed that for me.

This realisation feels incredibly comforting, and I hope it does for you too. I want growth that’s achievable, comfortable, makes me feel safe, close to people, a business that’s enjoyable, aligns and is all part and one with a life I love.

After a couple of years in this iteration of my business, I’m finally finding my feet in regard to really doing things the way I want to and ways that feel right to ME. And guess what, that's the way that always works best, funny that!

I don’t feel the need to do everything that’s suggested to me. I’m always up for suggestions and seeking out new ideas, that’s how we learn and LOADS of things I’ve been taught are absolutely brilliant! But if after trying them for a while, they don’t feel as comfortable as my favourite Conscious Citizen tracksuit does (when I’m home and put it on with no underwear under it! TMI? Ah well…), well, they’re just not right for me (we are all different). If they feel like a belted waistband that digs in every time I sit, I’ll let them go!

Nervous System Lesson coming up! I’ve learned that when we’re forcing ourselves to do things that don’t feel right, it’s a sign our nervous system is on alert. Our body is trying to communicate that something’s off, creating discomfort in every way it can. The more we ignore it, the more the body stays in a state of dysregulation, pulling us further away from feeling at ease. Regulation is our natural state, where we feel calm, steady, and connected, healthy and gorgeous. In fact this state is THE ultimate aspiration in life (and this I can confirm from every single conversation I've had!)

So, once again, here’s what I’m saying: trust that intuition, learn to feel and use the signals from your nervous system. Use the signals from your gut, your chest, that inner voice. And be brave, only do what feels truly right for you, and I can pretty much promise a happy life.

Hit reply if you have any comments or questions - I’m always here x